Island Banking: My Two Cents on Basic Coin Service

How to handle a full change jar on an island:

Step #1 – Gather all of your loose change

Step 1-Gather Loose ChangeStep #2 – Place change in a convenient container so the nice people at the bank can take it to their coin sorting machine.Step 2-Put Change in Convenient ContainerStep #3 – Wait in a LONG line because there is NEVER a short line at the bank.  When finally reaching the front of the line, be told the bank does not have a coin sorting machine.

Translation: We have a coin sorting machine, but not for little customers like you.

Instead, receive a fistful of bags and be instructed to return after sorting your own damn coins. Step 3-Receive Useless BagsStep #4 – Sort your own damn coins, or… Step 4-Sort Your Own ChangeAlternative step: Look up your bank’s information and realize that, in their Cayman Islands branches alone, they have $1.9 BILLION in customer deposits!  Daydream about filling the bags with unsorted coins and using them to smack whichever VP decided they don’t have enough money to buy a coin sorting machine in order to provide this basic banking service to their customers. Or-Fill with unsorted change and daydream of smacking a bank VPDisclaimer: Not an actual threat of violence.  Daydreams such as these prevent actual acts of violence against bank vice presidents, whether deserved or not.

(Hint: It is deserved and no jury would convict me.  They’ve all had to wait in bank lines, they all have change jars, and they’ve all dreamed of putting a sockful of nickels to use on some suit who decided to cut corners in customer service!)